Tomorrows and Yesterdays

In costume, from "The Music Man"

Well, it’s over…the 3+ months of rehearsals, followed by 18 performances during the course of the last three weekends, and “The Music Man” has now become another part of my history.  It’s kind of bittersweet, really.  The schedule was extremely intense, and in many ways, I was ready for it to be over to return to my “normal” life.  There were a lot of things I had to put on hold to be a part of this show.  Among those, I have not been to the gym in a while, and I took a session off from school.  Getting home from rehearsals and shows anywhere from 10:30pm-midnight kept me from getting up at 4:45am for the gym, and there’s no way I could have kept up with schoolwork during the production while still working full-time.  On the other hand, I have to say, upending my schedule was well worth it and I was truly sad to see it come to an end!  I gained a whole new theatre family with our cast and crew, loved getting to experience it all with my oldest son, was reminded how much I love performing classic Broadway musicals, and had a few life lessons reinforced along the way. 

For instance, it can be so easy to get stuck in a rut of how we think we’re supposed to be living our lives, can’t it?  I mean, if we’re at least reasonably responsible, we get up every day and tend to our duties, whether that be to family, school, church, work, or other things.  In doing so, time, money, and energy can be stretched thin, and dreams often get set off to the sidelines.  Trying something new, or taking a leap of faith, or embracing an adventure, fall outside of the realm of the possible, because they just don’t fit the mold of what we expect of ourselves, or what the others who influence our lives expect of us.  We get caught in the trap of “tomorrow…”

Pushing dreams, risk, and exploration off until “tomorrow” keeps us chained to the past.  It's the classic case of doing "what I've always done".  Think about it…Examples of saying you’ll “get around to it” at some point in the future find their way into everyday matters, such as:

I’ll start eating right tomorrow…means you’ll keep putting junk into your body and gaining weight today

I’ll forgive that person tomorrow…means you’ll continue to bear the damaging weight of a grudge today

I’ll take the steps to start my own business or apply for that new job tomorrow…means you’ll still feel chained to your desk today

I’ll invest in relationships with others tomorrow…means you’ll stand alone today

I’ll try something new tomorrow…means you’ll miss out on opportunities and excitement today

At one point in the script for “The Music Man”, one of the characters speaks the most profound line of the entire show.  He says,

“You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays.  I don’t know about you, but I’d like to make today worth remembering”

 ~ The Music Man ~

I want each of my days to be worth remembering!  I spent far too many days being afraid to try new things, afraid to let go of what was comfortable and familiar, and afraid to grad hold of something new.  Our lives are made up of days.  We only get so many of them, and I want each and every one of mine to be extraordinary!

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(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Give Up and Gain

In a recent conversation about my weight loss someone asked me, “What was the hardest thing for you to give up?”  As I thought about it, there’s no one particular food item that came to mind as being particularly hard to give up.  Aside from fast food (which I talk about here), I haven’t really cut many things out completely.  Instead, the past 19 months have been teaching me how to live my life with a healthy balance in my food choices, which is something I’ve never had until now. 

There are things I have definitely cut way back on.  Butter, sauces, dips, and dressings are what I consider trouble served in a little cup.  Think about it…in a restaurant, these items are served in innocent looking small portions on the side of a plate, but they pack a huge calorie wallop with little to no nutritional value, and I’m just not willing to accept that any more.  While I may occasionally have a tiny amount of one if it’s very a good quality, I’ve found that most food actually tastes much better if it’s not swimming in a pourable or spreadable topping!

I really can’t think of anything else that I’ve completely eliminated.  I have made more healthy substitutions and swaps than I can keep up with, and as a result, I haven’t ever felt deprived of things I really enjoy. Throughout my 156 pound loss to-date, I have eaten out at restaurants at least a couple of times each week, I’ve had cake at birthday parties, and survived several church potluck events.  My family and I eat the same meals for dinner together every night (except when I swap broccoli slaw for pasta…I haven’t gotten the kids on board for that one yet!), and we make homemade pizza every so often.  Portion control, more nutritious ingredients, and overall healthier choices have made all the difference!

As I think about it, I guess I have given up some other things, but in doing so, I’ve gained so much more…

- I have given up spending time in front of the television…and gained lean muscle and functional strength by going to the gym to workout!

- I have given up fast food…and gained freedom from severe reflux problems!

- I have given up a negative self-image…and gained a sense of empowerment!

- I have given up the idea that I can do this on my own…and gained a new understanding of Philippians 4:13 that tells me I really can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!

- I have given up living in a constant state of denial…and gained a clear sense of reality!

- I have given up feeling out of control…and gained a peaceful balance!

- I have given up overeating…and gained my mobility!

- I have given up defeat…and gained victory!

The value of what I have gained far outweighs what I’ve given up.  There’s just no comparison!  What will you gain if you make the choice to give something up today?

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Firecrackers and Pilot Lights

As we’re now a little more than a week into the new year of 2013, I have to admit that the sheer number of television and radio commercials dedicated to weight loss products and services is a bit overwhelming.  In addition, retailers are on the proverbial bandwagon as well by putting all things workout-related on sale this month.  It’s as though the whole country starts a collective diet and exercise plan about the time the last of the Christmas dinner leftovers have been eaten or thrown out.

While I’m obviously a strong advocate for eating healthy foods and exercising, and sincerely applaud anyone who decides to make healthy improvements in their life, I can’t help but think of all the money that will be spent for gym memberships that will only be used a few times and forgotten about, and all of the trendy workout clothes that will be purchased only to be donated to the local thrift stores in a few months.  So many people go into the new year with the best intentions for their “resolutions” of diet and exercise.  Sadly, a majority of those resolutions go unfulfilled.

The way I see it, a person can make a resolution regarding changes they want to make in their life, and they’ll either become like a firework or like a pilot light.  Let me explain…

Fireworks are exciting!  They are typically displayed at important times of the year, most often during the holidays or at a big celebration.  Fireworks go off with a “BANG!” and because of this, they draw a lot of attention.  They get the “ooohhh’s” and “ahhhh’s” of onlookers and infuse the air with energy…but only briefly.  You see, that’s the thing about fireworks.  After the initial flash, they sizzle through the air as the spark burns out and they fade away.  There's no long-lasting comittment with a firework.  Fireworks are the perfect example of the expression, “well, it was great while it lasted”.

A pilot light, on the other hand, is not very exciting at all.  Honestly, most people don’t really think about a pilot light all that much.  It’s small and usually hidden away underneath or behind an appliance like a hot water heater or a stove.  No one boasts, “Hey, have you seen my pilot light lately?  Come on out to the garage a take a look!”  The beauty of a pilot light, however, is that it has an ongoing job to do and it just keeps on burning.  Did you catch that?  It just keeps on burning…

Resolutions can be like the exciting, but temporary firework, exploding into the new year with lots of pizzazz but forgotten about rather quickly.  Resolutions can also be like the ho-hum, yet continually burning pilot light that stays committed to getting the work done, day in and day out.

Me?  I’d rather be a pilot light than a firework any day!

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Happy 2013!

Wow!  When I look back over 2012, it was an incredibly full year!  Some of the health and weight-related highlights for me included:

- Losing 92.1 pounds during the year

- Not having to take reflux medicine even once this year

- Regaining strength in my back and reclaiming my mobility

- Joining a gym

- Discovering that I actually enjoy working out

- Running a 5K distance in the local park in under 46 minutes

- Going down FIVE sizes in jeans (from a 32 to a 22)

- Going down from a size 30/32 to a size 18/20 in tops/dresses/jackets

- Teaching my “Reflections” Bible study series to a great group of women

In my blog from 11/1/12 titled “2012 Year End Goals” I listed 7 specific goals I made for myself to accomplish between 11/1/2 and 12/31/12.  Here’s my list of hits and misses:

1) Lose 15 pounds (this will put me exactly 75 pounds away from my final goal weight!) 

            RESULT: I lost 19 pounds across November and December!!!

2) Work out 3 times a week, even on holiday weeks

            RESULT:  As I noted in a previous post, I am in rehearsals for a show called, “The Music Man”, which I am having a fabulous time with, however, it has thrown my gym schedule into a tizzy!  I have not been in the gym nearly as often as I would have liked to have been, however, I’m getting in some cardio in dance rehearsals, and I’m getting ready to start the 30-Day Shred video workouts at home.

3) Increase the intensity of my workouts (higher weights, increased sets/reps, etc.)

            RESULT:  My trainer at the gym has reformatted my workout to help me accomplish this, and as soon as my show finishes, I’m going to head into my new routine.  For now, the videos at home will at least provide a fresh approach and keep me moving.

4) Register for my first 5K run

            RESULT:  I had planned to register for the local zoo’s 5K, which is held in January, however, I’ve got a rehearsal I can’t miss on the day of the run, so I’m going to look for a 5K for March or April instead.  I just need to find one now and get registered!

5) Increase my running speed/endurance (move from running intervals to extended periods of running)

            RESULT:  I have been making improvements in this area, but still have a long way to go!  This will be an ongoing goal.

6) Go down one size in jeans

            RESULT:  Yes!  I was in a size 24 on November 1^st, and am currently in a size 22, and  am not too far from moving down again to a size 20.  The last time I wore a size 20 jeans,  I was in the 7^th grade!

7) Pay attention to and appreciate the people and interactions at holiday gatherings more than the food

            RESULT:  I had one of the best holiday seasons I can remember having!  I truly enjoyed my time with family and friends and didn’t stress over food.  I wasn’t fixated on the goodies, but I wasn’t scared to eat either.  I kept things in balance far more than I indulged.  I had more hugs than cookies, and that equals success!

How was your holiday season?  Did you accomplish your goals?  What are you working on for 2013?

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)



Hello Facebook!

I am excited to tell you that I have set up a Facebook page for my blog!  I would love for you to check it out and to Like it while you're there.  Just click this link to go directly to the page (you'll have to log on to Like it):

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This will take you right to my page, where you can click to Like it, and then don't forget to hover over the Like button and check the box for "show in news feed" so that you don't miss any of the posts.

I'll be posting links whenever I have written a new blog, as well as fun updates from time to time.  I promise not to overwhelm your newsfeed! 

When I first began my journey to lose 225 pounds through healthy choices in food and exercise, I had a hard time finding others who had succeeded in doing what I was trying to accomplish.  I found many examples of folks who had lost 100 or even 150 pounds without surgeries, programs, fad diets, or other extreme measures, but those who have lost over 200 pounds "on their own" so to speak, were a lot fewer and farther between.  Although I'm still working towards my goal (down 147 pounds so far!), I hope that my story can be an encouragement to others.

Please feel free to share the link on your own Facebook page and help me spread the word about From Polyester to Spandex!

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Why Wait?

Having spent my entire life as an overweight person (seriously, I was way too heavy for my age even as a toddler!), I always knew that I needed to do something to get my eating habits under control.  An entry from my journal when I was 13 said, “I am going to start watching what I eat and get skinny…” The following day, my next entry expresses clearly that I didn’t know how to do that, and had failed miserably when I wrote, “Mama made macaroni and cheese with little smokies for dinner tonight.  I ate a whole plate of macaroni and 6 sausages and then had seconds.  Guess I’ll always be fat.”  While I can remember ALWAYS wanting to be thinner, it took me until I was 39 years old to actually DO something about it.

Knowing and doing can be worlds apart…but they don’t have to be!  I knew I had reached my all-time highest weight back in June 2011 long before I ever got on the scale because I was wearing the biggest clothes I had ever owned.  No one had to tell me that I needed to make some healthy changes.  No one reaches a size 34/36 without realizing that they are huge and have some issues they need to address!  I had decided that I was going to start implementing changes right after my 39^th birthday passed and start fresh at the beginning of the next month, on July 1^st.  On June 16^th, however, I was out shopping and found a great scale on sale that had one of the highest weight limits I had ever seen available for a personal home scale, so I went ahead and bought it in preparation for my big day on the 1^st.  I also downloaded the MyFitnessPal app onto my phone that morning so I could play around with it and learn how to use it properly. 

While trying to get everything set up for a day in the future I had tagged as my “start date”, the combination of tracking the calories of the food I ate that day, along with setting up my new scale and facing the truth of how much I actually weighed caused me to forget about waiting until July 1^st.  I immediately began weighing and tracking daily, and I have continued to do so diligently for the more than 500 days since then. 

It is easy to say you need to do something to improve your health, be it losing weight, making better nutritional choices, beginning a workout program, or something else, but if you convince yourself that you’ll start it on Monday, next week, next month, or with a New Year’s resolution, then chances are, you’ll lose the drive and motivation, or talk yourself out of it, and never start. 

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned through the last 17 months is to identify the changes that need to be made, and then don’t hesitate, just make them!  The ideal time is now, because if you wait for the perfect time, excuses will get in the way and that perfect time will never come.

My motto now is, “Why wait?”

So…What are you waiting for???

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

2012 Year-End Goals

I can't believe today is November 1st and we've only got two months left of 2012!  Yesterday couldn't possibly have been Halloween, could it?  I think it was actually Valentine's Day and everyone was just confused...either that, or this year is absolutely flying by!

I guess reality wins out, because today I'm thinking about the goals I want to achieve between now and the end of the year.  For so many years in my past, Halloween was the kick-off to the prime food and goodies time of the year that involved several holiday parties and get-togethers over the Thanksgiving and Christmas season, and wrapped up with our annual family New Year's Day bash, guaranteeing each new year was started by trying to find my way out of a food coma.  But, by golly, times have changed!

Last year, I did really well throughout November and December by maintaining my weight, and actually losing a pound or two during that time.  I had only started my weight loss efforts in June 2011, so by Thanksgiving, I was only 5 months in with 56 pounds lost, but was determined I wouldn't blow it over the holidays.  To that end, I made a conscious decision to raise my daily calorie intake from loss levels to maintenance levels for those two months.  That allowed me a little wiggle room but still kept me in check as I continued to log everything I ate.  Yes, I even journaled my food on Thanksgiving and Christmas Day!

This year, however, things are a little different.  I'm now 16 months in with a loss of 136 pounds, and I really don't want to give up making progress for the next two months just because it's the holidays.  I've decided to go to maintenance levels (which affords me a few hundred extra calories per day) only on Thanksgiving and Christmas Days, not for the entire season this year.  The fact is, I like wearing smaller clothes and feeling better far more than I like pumpkin pie or yeast rolls!

That being said, I'm heading into the final weeks of 2012 with specific health and weight goals I want to reach and with a plan in place to achieve them, and I thought I'd share a couple of them with you here.

November & December 2012 Goals
1) Lose 15 pounds (this will put me exactly 75 pounds away from my final goal weight!)
2) Work out 3 times a week, even on holiday weeks
3) Increase the intensity of my work outs (higher weights, increased sets/reps, etc.)
4) Register for my first 5K run
5) Increase my running speed/endurance (move from running intervals to extended periods of running)
6) Go down one size in jeans
7) Pay attention to and appreciate the people and interactions at holiday gatherings more than the food

So, there you have it!  Those are a few of my goals.  Have you started thinking about the end of the year yet?  What kind of goals are you setting?  I'd love to hear from you!  Let's finish this year off feeling great about ourselves by making healthy choices!

My Workouts

From time to time I get asked what kind of workouts or exercise that I’m doing, so I thought I’d share a bit about that part of my journey today.

When I first started my transition into a healthier lifestyle in June 2011, mobility and endurance were a struggle for me.  I was dealing with a sciatic nerve injury, which was intensified by the extra weight I was carrying on my body.  There were many days when it could literally take anywhere from 15 – 30 minutes for me to go from a laying down position to standing up from my bed in the mornings simply due to the pain being so bad and making it so hard to even move.  Once up, standing or walking for more than just a few minutes was out of the question. 

This being the case, in my mind exercise seemed out of reach for me when I first started making changes, although I knew that I needed to somehow find a way to get myself moving more.

For the first 11 months, from June 2011 – May 2012, my exercise was sporadic, at best.  From time to time I would do a brief workout with a video, or would go outside to walk during my lunch break at work, but that was about it.  During that time, I really focused on learning to eat right and get my nutrition into balance.  Self-control in my eating habits became my primary goal.  I knew that I had to get that area under control before exercise would do me much good, because I didn’t want to work myself silly in the gym just to try to keep up with my eating. 

The personal discipline I have learned in my food habits has now transferred over to my exercise.  As I have posted about previously, I joined a gym in May 2012, and have been going strong with it ever since.  I’m finding that I love pushing myself a little bit farther with each workout, be it through a faster speed or higher incline on the treadmill, or by increasing weights or reps in my strength training.  Most of all, I am continually thankful to no longer have the mobility issues I used to suffer with. 

These days, my workouts vary, typically between in the gym and at home workouts, based on my schedule.  I am pretty adamant about exercising a minimum of three times per week, and sometimes get in four in a week.  I know a lot of people swear by 6-days per week workouts, but I know what will realistically work for me, and setting challenging, yet obtainable goals has been key for my success thus far, so right now, my goal remains 3-4 per week.  What do those look like right now?

At the gym:

- My gym routine changes every month or so to keep things fresh, but always involves 30-40 minutes on the treadmill.  I do intervals with my speed, ranging from 3.3mph to 5.0mph with the incline ranging from 1.0 – 8.0.  In addition, I do strength training in the circuit using 12 different machines, lifting/pushing/pulling weights from 30-120 pounds with reps ranging from 25-40.  I also have two additional machines I use that are targeted towards helping the sciatic issues specifically.  When I can catch an extra day in the gym, I’ll swim laps for 30-60 minutes.

At home:

- Running/Walking up and down our hill – We live at the top of a fairly steep incline and our street is just over 1/10^th of a mile long.  As my heart rate monitor (HRM) has proven, making laps back and forth up and down the hill provides a great cardio workout and burns a lot of calories! 

- There is a park close by my house and I’ve just recently started making use of their pathways for walking/running

- I have several sets of weights and videos that incorporate both strength and cardio training.  I don’t do these too often, because I much prefer being outside or at the gym, but they’re good for a change every now and then.

That about sums it up! 

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Questions & Answers

At this point in my weight loss journey, I get asked a lot of questions from people who have been watching my transformation.  I thought I'd take the opportunity to answer a few that I get pretty often.

Question: "What are you eating these days?"
My Answer:  Lots of whole foods, very little processed foods, no fast food, keeping between 1400-1500 calories per day.

Question: "Did you have weight loss surgery?"
My Answer:  No, I lost over 90 pounds in the first 11 months through changing my food habits, and have continued to lose as I upped my game by joining a gym to add cardio and strength training since May 2012.

Question: "How can you give up sweets/chocolate/bread/etc.?"
My Answer:  I haven't!  I can't imagine living the rest of my life without bread or mashed potatoes, but I don't eat them every day, and I've found healthier alternatives I've switched to that I love.  

Question: "Do you ever have a 'cheat day' and eat whatever you want?"
My Answer:  No, I don't have anything or anyone to cheat but myself if I were to eat something crazy.  I'm not on a diet program, so I have no specific restrictions.  My focus is on eating in a well-balanced manner each and every day.  For example, my sister makes the best cakes with fondant anywhere, and I enjoy some of that at family birthdays.  I'm not cheating by having a small piece.  I know it's coming, and I plan ahead for it to fit into my calories.  I don't eat a huge chunk of it.  A small piece is enough to enjoy! To put it into perspective, I eat broccoli 5 or 6 days a week, but I have eaten cake maybe 5 or 6 times in the past year.  I AM eating whatever I want to, because I truly want to eat the way that I am these days!

Question: "Don't you crave junk food once in a while?"
My Answer:  No, not really.  Once I was about 6 months in, I realized my tastes had completely changed.  My biggest craving now is watermelon!  If I haven't had any in a few days, I find myself making a lunchtime run to the grocery store and loading up on 2 or 3 pounds of seedless watermelon and I eat it over the next couple of days.  I buy it in the pre-cut bowls in the produce department, and that's my big splurge!

The question I get asked most often, without a doubt, is two-fold...
"How did you make the decision to lose weight, and how have you stuck with it so long?"

I'll answer it in my next blog post, so stay tuned!

The "P" Word

One of the things I always want to convey through this blog is the real-life aspect of weight loss.  While I do not advocate using a public forum to vent frustrations or complaints, there are definitely real challenges to face when you set out to lose weight, especially when the amount you intend to lose is significant, and I believe it’s important to share those things as well. 

For the last two weeks, my scale has not budged downward.  In fact, I’ve had daily fluctuations, but stayed within the same 3-pound range for the last 17 days.  I have not strayed from my food plan, and continue to eat between 1400-1500 calories per day.  In addition, I’ve been doing great at the gym and have not missed a single workout.  So what’s going on?  Let me tell you…

(Before I go any further, I know that many people believe you should only weigh-in weekly, or even monthly, to avoid the emotional highs and lows that can be a part of daily weigh-ins.  For me, however, daily has worked for the last 13 months, so I’m sticking with it.)

Because of the detailed progress spreadsheet I keep, where I track my daily weigh-ins, I can look back and see that this is not the first time I’ve reached, what most would term, a plateau.  The term “plateau” (according to dictionary.com) has several meanings, all having to do with reaching a place where progress ceases to rise.  There are two definitions, however, that really stand out to me.  The first one reads, “remain at a stable level of achievement,” and the second one calls a plateau, “a period of little or no apparent progress…” (italics mine).

When you know you’re doing the work, yet you’re not seeing the expected results, it’s important to remember that word “achievement.”  Just because I didn’t lose 2 pounds this week doesn’t take anything away from the 115 pound loss I have already achieved!  When you reach a plateau, that’s a good time to look back at how far you’ve really come!  The second important thing to think about is the second definition I mentioned.  Just because your progress doesn’t look apparent on the scale doesn’t mean you’ve come to a screeching halt!  For me, it’s a signal that my body is ready for me to change things up a bit.  It’s time to increase the incline on the treadmill and add in more interval training, it’s time to change around the order in which I perform my strength training exercises.  It’s time to flip around what time of day I eat my larger calorie meals vs. my smaller calorie meals, etc.  From experience, a few small changes will go a long way in getting things kick-started back up again.

Another interesting thing I realized about my plateau periods.  Each one has come when I’ve reached a weight that I maintained for a long period in the past.  For example, the last plateau I experienced came when I got back down to the size I was 10 years ago.  I had been at that weight for the better part of 5 years or more.  Right now, I’m made it down to the size I was in my last two years of high school, which I continued to be throughout college and for a few years after that.  Each of these plateaus came when I reached a point that my body was comfortable in for a long time in the past.  While my body may want to stay here to visit for a while, I’m packin’ it up and movin’ it on down the street to a much smaller address!  The eviction notice has been served!

With each of the plateaus I’ve went through previously, as I come out of them, I’ve hit great new loss levels quickly.  That being said, I am poised and ready to break through to new lows very soon!

My take-aways from plateau periods include:

1)     Plateaus will happen, they are inevitable!

2)     Don’t give up just because you’ve hit a plateau!

3)     Plateaus are a chance to realize how much you’ve already acheived!

4)     Plateaus should not become comfort zones!

5)     Scale progress may not be apparent in a plateau, but there are other kinds of progess!

6)     Plateaus are a chance to change things around and make it more interesting!

7)     Don’t slack off when you reach a plateau, keep working and you’ll break through it!

“Let us not become weary in doing good,

for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

~ Galatians 6:9 ~

I Like It! I Really Like It!

As someone who has been overweight practically my entire life, physical activity is not something I have ever really enjoyed.  With a family that had no interest in sports, the outdoors, or anything that required any kind of physical activity, I was never encouraged to participate in anything that would promote physical fitness and my family never did anything like this together. As a child and teen, the required gym classes in school were complete torture for me.  Things like running relay races, rope climbing, or even playing games like basketball were never fun, but instead, typically left me in tears because I never had the strength, speed, stamina, or energy my classmates always seemed to have. 

The one exception came during high school, when my love of playing music and acting edged out my hatred of being active only slightly, but it was enough that I was in the marching band throughout high school and for one year of college, and performed in many stage shows that involved choreography and basic dance.  I credit my involvement in these activities as helping me keep from gaining even more weight than I did when I was younger. 

When I first started my weight loss journey 13 months ago, I did a little bit of exercise in the beginning, but my heart really wasn’t in it.  I dove into the deep end immediately where my food changes were concerned, but I still made a lot of excuses for not working out regularly.  I still felt like the chubby little kid that just wasn’t cut out for exercise, so I pretty much gave it up until I was 11 months in and had lost almost 100 pounds.  It was at that point I resigned myself to the fact that I really needed to start working on toning while I continued to lose and move forward towards my goal weight.

Over the last 2 months since I joined the gym, things have changed drastically for me.  I have found that I actually love working out!  I won’t sugar-coat it…it’s been hard work, but as the saying goes, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you!”  I checked in with a trainer before I got started initially, and he gave me specific instructions for both cardio and strength work to do 3 times each week at the gym, and he told me to make sure to get in an hour of some other exercise (swimming, group classes, at home DVD’s, etc.) at least 2 other days each week.  At the end of each month, the trainer works with me again to assess my progress and add new things to my workout program, which has involved adding new exercises as well as increasing sets and reps, and increasing how much weight I’m lifting. 

For the first time in my life, I can truly say that I look forward to exercising.  I don’t give up half-way through, and I don’t skip out or cheat on my schedule.  I have made it a priority.  Some days I go to the gym at 5:30am, other days I go at 5:00pm.  Some days I’m in the middle of my living room with the furniture pushed back and the dog trying to stay out of my way.  Wherever or whenever, I am determined to take care of my body and work towards making it the best it can possibly be.  I have dumped the excuses, and instead have chosen to view each workout like this:

Exercise…

I don’t stop when I’m tired.

I don’t stop when I don’t feel like doing it.

I don’t stop when it hurts.

I stop when I’m done.

A Marathon...In Bits and Pieces

I am, by nature, an extremely organized individual in many areas of my life, and weight loss is no exception.  Keeping up with data and creating charts and graphs has helped me identify trends in my progress and lets me readily see what efforts produce the best results.  In addition, having information such as my body measurements, BMI, BMR, body fat %, and other metrics on hand helps me see that this journey is about more than just the numbers on the scale.  Seeing the number go down on the scale is not my only goal.  Improving my overall health and fitness is also very important to me as well.  When those things are in balance, the numbers on the scale will follow.

On one of my progress spreadsheets I keep track of each of my workouts, including the name of each strength-training exercise, the number of sets and reps I do, and the weight I’m lifting (or pushing, pulling, etc.).  I also log my cardio work by what I’m doing, the amount of time I spend doing it, the distance I’ve gone (for swimming, walking, etc.), and my total calorie burn.  It’s quick and easy for me to use and with a glance I can see where I’m at each week and I can challenge myself to go a little further each time.

Today, as I was entering the stats from this morning’s workout, I realized something I found exciting!  Since joining the gym, I’ve included treadmill work in 18 of my workouts.  In the course of those 18 workouts, which totaled 9.9 hours of time, I have walked/jogged a total of 26.3 miles, which is just over the distance of a marathon!  Now, I understand full well that I have not, by any means, had the experience of actually participating in an actual marathon, but knowing that I have covered that distance over a few workouts feels pretty amazing to me!  Let me explain the significance of this…

When I look back to the time before I started implementing healthy food choices into my life regularly last June, mobility had started being a serious problem for me.  Due to issues with my sciatic nerve causing terrible back and leg pain (as the result of falling some time ago and it being unable to fully heal because of my weight), things as simple as moving from a laying down position in the bed to sitting up, or rising from the living room couch were excruciating, and often could take 30 minutes or more.  It was often accompanied by a lot of pain-filled tears and much prayer for strength and healing.  Once I was finally up and about, walking any distance over just a few steps was typically out of the question.  Even trying to make a short trip into a store would find me hunched over the buggy trying to relieve the pressure on my back within just a couple minutes of walking in.  Doing anything that required me to be on my feet for more than 5 minutes was next to impossible. 

As hard as it is to admit, being as overweight as I was before I started this journey, my life was hindered in everything from sleep, to playing with my children, to travel, to just about everything else that required physical activity.  When it’s painful to sit, stand, or lie down, there is little respite. As my weight has come down, however, the back pain has subsided greatly and my mobility has improved to where I don't have to worry about it anymore!  I now look forward to getting out and about and I’m not afraid of being somewhere that requires a lot of standing or walking.  The only time I think about getting around in a situation these days, is when I stop to realize how great it is to move freely again, and then I say a prayer of thanks to God for it!  I still deal with pain from time to time, but it’s not constant anymore, and it's nowhere near as bad as what it was before, and I believe it’s only going to keep getting better as I continue exercising and losing weight! 

So, when I look at my workout log and see that I’ve walked 26+ miles, it makes me see just how far I’ve really come and it gives me the motivation to keep going, because I know I’m definitely headed in the right direction!  Maybe...just maybe, one of these days, I just might go all 26 miles in the same day!

My One Year Weight Loss Anniversary...104.9 Pounds Lost!

WOW!  I can hardly believe it has been an entire YEAR since I began my weight loss journey!  Last year on June 16^th I stepped onto the scale and cried.  No, perhaps “sobbed” is a better word for it.  I couldn’t get my mind around the number that showed up on the scale.  I wondered how in the world had I let myself go like that?  I’ve always been overweight, but for crying out loud, not to that extreme! 

I had to make a change.  If I didn’t make a drastic turn around now, every medical statistic pointed towards a future defined by serious health problems and a shortened lifespan.  I made a decision that day.  I refused to give up a long and healthy life in exchange for a meal in a paper bag shoved at me through a drive-through window and served with a side of fries!

So, here I am, exactly one year later.  Only now, my tears are tears of joy!  I set a goal to lose 100 pounds in a year, and I’ve not only met it, but I have exceeded my goal!  I have lost 104.9 pounds in exactly one year!!!  Right now, I’m getting ready to head out to the gym this morning to have my 2^nd monthly check-in with my personal trainer, who is about to ramp up my workouts for my next phase of exercise as I start working on my year two goals, and guess what?  BRING IT ON!!!

So…what kind of difference can one year make?  Here’s what I’ve experienced over this past year:

- I have lost a grand total of 104.9 pounds!

- I have lost a total of 2.75 inches around my neck!

- I have lost a total of 4.0 inches around my chest!

- I have lost a total of 8.0 inches around my waist!

- I have lost a total of 13.0 inches around my hips!

- My BMI has gone down by 16.9 points!

- My reflux symptoms have all but disappeared and I no longer take any medication at all!

- I have gone down 5 sizes in clothing!

- I have gone from limited mobility (due to a combination of my weight and a back injury), to being able to walk/jog a 5K in under an hour!

- I have gone from being completely sedentary, to working out at the gym 4-5 times per week!

- I have gone from eating around 3,000 calories per day, to eating 1,500-1,600 calories per day

- I have gone from eating fast food 10-12 times per week to eliminating it from my diet!

- I have gone from struggling to carry bags of groceries from the car to the house, to lifting weights!

- I have gone from drinking approximately 64 ounces of diet soda per day, to drinking approximately 80 ounces (or more) of water per day!

As I look back over this year, I have been very blessed with incredible support along the way, and I would like to make a few special notes today, on my one-year anniversary…

I must give God the praise and all of the glory for giving me the strength to walk this path!  There are places He has mended in my heart and in my mind along the way, and I have let go of emotional weight right alongside the physical weight.  It’s only because of Him that I’ve experienced any measure of success!

I am also forever grateful to my sweet husband!  He has been my biggest cheerleader!  He has loved me and told me I was beautiful, no matter what size I have been.  He has prayed for me and helped me celebrate every pound I’ve lost.  There just aren’t enough words to describe my thankfulness for him.  He indeed has my heart!

Thank you to my encouraging church!  So many people have said positive things to me and been so encouraging to me!  I appreciate you very much!

Lastly, I have a small handful of people who have been praying for me and encouraging me privately since I began.  They have held my trust and as I confided in them about where I was starting from and where I was trying to get, and have continued to support me throughout.  They are a treasure to my life!

All of that being said…my work is far from over!  I have a good deal more weight to lose before I can consider myself done and move into maintenance mode.  I am ready to start moving towards my year-two goals!

Getting Past the Fear

I mentioned in a previous post that I’ve recently joined a gym.  As I’ve lost weight, I promised myself that when I reached 100 pounds lost, I would look to join some kind of fitness center.  I recognize the importance of exercise, and the need to strengthen and tone as I continue moving forward in my progress.  A couple of weeks ago, around the time I hit the 97 pound mark, I received a flyer in my mail from a local gym that was offering incentives for women to join their new women’s fitness program.  I figured I was close enough to my first big goal to go ahead and check it out.

I felt great about signing up and taking out my membership with the gym!  I was confident going in to my first meeting with the trainer that this was the right program for me and that it had come along at the perfect time.  My first workout with the trainer went really well, as he walked me through the weight training machines I was to start with and gave me instructions about the cardio work I was to do.  That first meeting was on a Saturday, early afternoon, and the gym was relatively empty, so I wasn’t the least bit stressed about any of it, and was excited to really get going with it.

Two days later, on Monday, I pulled into the gym parking lot after work, around 4:30pm and gasped when I saw around 40-50 cars in the parking lot!  My only reservation about joining a gym was facing my greatest workout fear…exercising in a packed, co-ed gym…and that was what I was about to walk in to, on my very first workout without my trainer!

I sat in the car for a few minutes debating whether I would even go in or not.  I seriously contemplated just going home and coming back early the next morning before work instead, hoping it would be less crowded then.  I prayed for the courage to get past my fear, took a deep breath and headed in.  I rationalized that I could always leave if I couldn’t handle it.

Although I’m supposed to do my weight training first, there were several people already in the circuit area, so instead, I hopped onto a treadmill to do cardio.  While I was on the treadmill for 30 minutes, I realized that more and more people were coming in as it passed 5pm and folks were getting off of work.  I kept telling myself that I would just leave when I finished the treadmill and I’d skip the weight training for the day.  Out of curiosity, I went back to the circuit area one more time before I left to see if there was any chance it had cleared out any, and instead, not only were there more people back there, but there was also a class going on next to that area as well.

That was the moment where I knew I was at a crossroad and my decision would affect the way I approached the gym from then on.  I forced myself to go ahead and do my weight training, and to not pay any attention to anyone else around me.  By the time I finished, I felt victorious!  Not only was I satisfied with my workout, but even more, I faced my fear, pushed past it, and won!  In the two weeks since then, I have looked forward to every visit to the gym, and actually found myself smiling and greeting other people I see there regularly.  Intimidation is a thing of the past!

We all face fears.  Experiencing fear isn’t wrong; it’s going to happen from time to time.  It’s what you do with that fear that is important.  You can choose to let your fears paralyze you and rob you of an experience, or of your joy, or of your peace of mind…or of your future.  Or, you can choose to find the irrationalities that are embedded in each fear, counter them with the truth, and find success.  Sometimes, the things you push yourself to do, despite your fears, lead you to your greatest accomplishments!

Drop the Excuses and DO IT!

If you read my last post, you saw that a medicine I took for a recent bout of respiratory illness caused some fluid retention and a temporary water-weight gain.  Well, thankfully, it has righted itself just as quickly as it began!  Since seeing the doctor on Thursday, the water weight is now gone, and my total weight loss is now up to 98.7 pounds (my loss tracker in the blog sidebar always rounds up once I pass each ½ pound and I believe in full-disclosure!).  Reaching the 100-pounds lost mark is so close!

A quick little encouraging tidbit I had this week...After being sick with the sinus infection and strep recently, and the water-issue with the two antibiotics and steroid dose pack, I told my primary care doctor that I had just joined a gym for the next phase of my weight loss.  Well, my primary care physician sent me to a cardiologist for clearance for exercise (which I got with no problem). Get ready for the cool part...

BOTH the primary doc and the cardiologist wanted to know in detail what I was doing to lose the weight I've lost in the last 11 months! All I've done, until joining the gym last week, was change my food habits and track what I eat in my food journal. My primary doc was very encouraging, cheering me on and telling me that the changes I've made in my eating and attitude are what it takes to be successful to reach my goals and maintain it for the rest of my life. The cardiologist said he wished that more of his patients would institute similar changes themselves and was very encouraging to me as well.

When you're on the brink of losing 100 pounds, but know you've got a lot more work to do to reach your final goal, it can be frustrating at times, but encouragement like that is a great motivator to keep on going!

That being said, I just want to you know that if you’re also trying to lose weight, be it 20 pounds or 200 pounds...you really CAN do this! No matter where you're at, or where you've come from in your struggles with food and weight loss, if you get honest with yourself and truly make the commitment to your well-being, you CAN get on the road to a healthier, smaller you!

I've been heavy my ENTIRE life, I'm about to turn 40, I have a CRAZY schedule (wife, mom, full-time employee at an investment firm, have two young sons under 8, serve as a pastor, and am in college working on my psychology degree), and I've found ways to make this work for my life. To do so, I've had to face every excuse I've ever made...you know the ones, like these:

"I'm so busy, I just don't have time right now"
"I'll do this when my kids get older"
"It's okay, I may be big but at least I don't have any health issues because of my weight"
"A lot of my extended family is overweight so it just runs in my family and I can't do anything about it"
"Healthy food is SO expensive"

“I’ve always been heavy, so I’m just meant to be this way”

“It’s what’s on the inside that matters, so why should I worry about my weight?”
"I don't want to eat boring, bland, diet food"

On and on the list goes...I finally had to say, ENOUGH! I was the only one who could make these changes in my life, and through a lot of prayers for strength and for getting my mind in the right place and to change my habits, I closed my eyes and jumped into the deep end of this thing and haven't looked back.

So, if you're working to reach your own goals, I applaud you, congratulate you, and want to encourage you to keep moving forward and celebrating each step you take that moves you closer to your goals!

Heading to the Gym

I have officially joined a gym! 

When I started this journey towards a healthy lifestyle and weight loss in June 2011, I did a bit of exercise on my own with video programs, but I only did that for the first few weeks.  Since then, I’ve had a few random days where I got outside and walked some, but haven’t really committed to any regular exercise until now.  There have been a couple of reasons for this…

My relationship with food has been skewed my entire life.  While my mom worked hard to make sure our family had meals on the table every day when I was growing up, almost everything she prepared was either canned or processed.  There were very few natural foods included in our meals and little cooking from scratch.  Consequently, I never really learned how to cook either.  Opening and heating really isn’t cooking!  Growing up like that also develops a tendency to continue gravitating towards those foods as an adult.  In addition, it became very easy for me to just “grab something” from a fast-food restaurant most days (often, more than once a day!) and blame it on my hectic schedule and lack of time to do anything else.  I have finally quit kidding myself and now recognize that a fast-food grilled chicken sandwich with a leaf of wilted lettuce thrown on it does not count as a healthy choice!

Over the last 11 months, I’ve had to redirect all of my food choices.  Before I could jump headfirst into an exercise schedule, I had to get my food issues straight first.  It would have done me no good whatsoever to head into a gym several times a week, only to run through a drive-through on the way home!  When I think back to the things I used to eat, sometimes I really can’t believe I used to put that junk into my body!  By getting my eating habits corrected first, I’ve avoided the trap of feeling like I can overeat or indulge just because I worked out.  I'm not working out so that I have an excuse to eat poorly.  I'm working out to tone and strengthen my body and to reach the point where I am lean and healthy.  Eating junk defeats the purpose!

In getting my food issues straightened out, I’ve developed a love for so many really healthy foods, and I’ve found that I truly prefer natural, whole foods.  I find myself craving things like salmon, watermelon, and broccoli, and cringing when I see someone eating a burger and fries.  Other people can eat it if they want it, but I just can’t even stomach the thought of it anymore.

I also think that I had to prove something to myself where food was concerned.  I had to lose the first 100 pounds or so through changes in my food only.  By doing so, it proved to me, once and for all, the effect that my food choices have on my body.  Because of that, I’ll never look back. 

Losing as much as I have through food choices only has also given me the confidence to know that I can do this!  When I walk into the gym, it’s with the knowledge that I am already successful, and working out is just going to help propel me further.  I don’t have to feel intimidated or out of place in the gym because I know how far I’ve already come. 

I have actually found myself excited about going to the gym…well, I wasn’t too excited on the day of my first full workout, but I’ll save that story for another post!