My Workouts

From time to time I get asked what kind of workouts or exercise that I’m doing, so I thought I’d share a bit about that part of my journey today.

When I first started my transition into a healthier lifestyle in June 2011, mobility and endurance were a struggle for me.  I was dealing with a sciatic nerve injury, which was intensified by the extra weight I was carrying on my body.  There were many days when it could literally take anywhere from 15 – 30 minutes for me to go from a laying down position to standing up from my bed in the mornings simply due to the pain being so bad and making it so hard to even move.  Once up, standing or walking for more than just a few minutes was out of the question. 

This being the case, in my mind exercise seemed out of reach for me when I first started making changes, although I knew that I needed to somehow find a way to get myself moving more.

For the first 11 months, from June 2011 – May 2012, my exercise was sporadic, at best.  From time to time I would do a brief workout with a video, or would go outside to walk during my lunch break at work, but that was about it.  During that time, I really focused on learning to eat right and get my nutrition into balance.  Self-control in my eating habits became my primary goal.  I knew that I had to get that area under control before exercise would do me much good, because I didn’t want to work myself silly in the gym just to try to keep up with my eating. 

The personal discipline I have learned in my food habits has now transferred over to my exercise.  As I have posted about previously, I joined a gym in May 2012, and have been going strong with it ever since.  I’m finding that I love pushing myself a little bit farther with each workout, be it through a faster speed or higher incline on the treadmill, or by increasing weights or reps in my strength training.  Most of all, I am continually thankful to no longer have the mobility issues I used to suffer with. 

These days, my workouts vary, typically between in the gym and at home workouts, based on my schedule.  I am pretty adamant about exercising a minimum of three times per week, and sometimes get in four in a week.  I know a lot of people swear by 6-days per week workouts, but I know what will realistically work for me, and setting challenging, yet obtainable goals has been key for my success thus far, so right now, my goal remains 3-4 per week.  What do those look like right now?

At the gym:

- My gym routine changes every month or so to keep things fresh, but always involves 30-40 minutes on the treadmill.  I do intervals with my speed, ranging from 3.3mph to 5.0mph with the incline ranging from 1.0 – 8.0.  In addition, I do strength training in the circuit using 12 different machines, lifting/pushing/pulling weights from 30-120 pounds with reps ranging from 25-40.  I also have two additional machines I use that are targeted towards helping the sciatic issues specifically.  When I can catch an extra day in the gym, I’ll swim laps for 30-60 minutes.

At home:

- Running/Walking up and down our hill – We live at the top of a fairly steep incline and our street is just over 1/10^th of a mile long.  As my heart rate monitor (HRM) has proven, making laps back and forth up and down the hill provides a great cardio workout and burns a lot of calories! 

- There is a park close by my house and I’ve just recently started making use of their pathways for walking/running

- I have several sets of weights and videos that incorporate both strength and cardio training.  I don’t do these too often, because I much prefer being outside or at the gym, but they’re good for a change every now and then.

That about sums it up! 

(Just a reminder/disclosure…I am not a medical professional or certified trainer, so anything I write in this blog is not intended to be taken as advice, guidance, or recommendations.  It is simply a journal of my own personal experiences.  Thanks!)

Changing Sizes

So much has changed in the last 16 months…I have lost over 135 pounds.  I look at the number on the scale and see the drastic difference.  I log my daily weight into a spreadsheet and I see the downward trend that has continued over the months.  The changes I’ve experienced come in so many practical, every day ways.  For instance…

- I have greatly improved mobility, flexibility, strength, and endurance.  Here at 40 years old, I feel far better than I did at 30. 

- I see photos of myself and can’t help but notice that I look younger and healthier.  I’m not afraid of having my picture taken anymore, and am having fun snapping a new picture with every 5 or 10 pounds I lose.

- After our recent travels I realized that I’m no longer someone who eats candy bars or chips from the gas station at every stop, or gets fast food on the road while traveling.  Instead, I’m someone who books her hotel rooms based on which hotel has the best fitness center and carries fruit and healthy snacks from home. 

I am not yet at my goal weight, but I realize how far I’ve come.  I know I’ve lost, as several people have said to me, “an entire person” with the amount of weight I’ve lost so far, but when I shop for clothes, I still have trouble getting my mind around my shrinking size…

I just took several of my winter coats from years past into the consignment store last weekend to sell them.  They all ranged from a women’s size 3X (26/28) to a women’s size 5X (34/36).  As I pulled each of them out of the closet, I laughed when I tried them all on, one by one, seeing if any of them still fit.  Each and every one of them was way too big for me and there’s no way any of them would work for this winter!

After dropping off the coats and picking up a check from some of the other clothes the consignment store had recently sold for me, I decided to go shopping for a new coat.  I found a beautiful, bright blue one that I loved, and grabbed one to try on.  Now, keep in mind, in my life, I’ve always had to look for the largest sizes available and hope for the best.  I knew that the size 3X coats I had just gotten rid of were too big, so I got a size 2X and wondered if it could possibly fit, and was completely shocked when it was too big!  I picked up a size 1X (18/20) and snickered to myself that there’s no way it was going to fit…but it did, and perfectly!  I guess I still couldn’t believe it though, because I switched back and forth between the 2X and 1X three more times, trying them both on, looking into the mirror, and comparing the way they each fit.  I’m still shaking my head and surprised that the 1X was the best choice and the one I ended up buying!

Goodness, I know that some women would shudder at the thought of being a size 18/20 and think that’s huge, but when you’ve come down from where I started from, it is reason to celebrate!  What’s even more fun, is I know that next year at this time, my beautiful blue size 1X coat will be too big and headed to the consignment store rack!

Feeling great in a size 1X!!!

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Whew!  The last month has been a whirlwind!  Here's a few random tidbits of catching up:

- Today is my 16-month anniversary since my change to a healthy lifestyle.  I have now lost a total of 135.3 pounds so far!  I am now just 89.7 pounds away from my goal weight!  Whoo hoo!

- My husband and I recently celebrated our 10-year wedding anniversary!  He is a 10-foot-tall superhero in my eyes, and I am so thankful God chose to give us to one another!

- I just finished another one of my college courses in working on my psychology degree and have spent the last several weeks doing a considerable bit of paper writing.  This class was called "Addictive Disorders" and although it focused primarily on substance use and abuse (such as drugs and alcohol, etc.), so much of the class was applicable to food addictions as well.  It provided a great deal of new insight to me in this area. The countdown is on...I've only got 7 classes left until graduation!

- A few months into my weight loss journey, I felt like God wanted me to share my story and to help encourage other people along the way.  One way I've done that is through this blog.  Another way has been through a class I've developed called "Reflections: Healthy and Beautiful from the Inside Out".  While I'm not a dietician or medical professional, I am a pastor, and as such, I've been given the opportunity through my church to present my class in an 8-week small group format.  We're going into Week 4 tomorrow night, and it has been a joy to speak to the women who have attended about spiritual, emotional, and practical issues regarding healthy living! 

- Without going into the details...our family experienced a terrible tragedy in the loss of my brother-in-law in a fatal car accident a couple of weeks ago, and my husband and I and our boys had to take an unexpected road trip to Texas for the funeral, covering over 2,000 miles in 5 days.  Along the way, we saw two major accidents on the interstate (one even had a life flight helicopter land on the highway to help out).  It was a rollercoaster of emotions as we prayed for those involved in those accidents, were grieving our loss, and were thankful for our own safe travels.

Through all of these events, along with many more, such as me continuing to work 40+ hours a week at the investment firm with almost 2 hours a day spent commuting back and forth, teaching a Bible School course on Ethics in Ministry, being out of town for 5 days on our annual pastor's retreat, being sick for two weeks, and keeping up with our kids, I've continued to carve out time to work out and have maintained healthy eating and kept losing weight through it all.

I guess that's the difference between a "diet" and a "lifestyle change" isn't it?  Diets are temporary.  They require strict adherence to work right, and typically have little to no flexibility.  When extraordinary life events pop up, diets can be thrown for a loop.  Making a lifestyle change, however, means learning how to make healthy choices and stick to your commitment, no matter the circumstances or situations you find yourself facing or how busy or hectic your schedule may become.

Finishing What I Started

This weekend I celebrated a major accomplishment!  I went to a park near our house and walked/jogged a 5K!  My total time was 45min 56sec for 3.13 miles.  I missed grabbing a screen shot of the mapping app right at the 5K distance and snapped it at 0.2 after, so I don’t have the time for 3.1 miles exactly.  I actually kept going though and did a grand total of 3.5 miles in 50min 52sec (which included a brief stop for about 10seconds to say a quick hello to some friends from church that happened to be driving by and pulled over when they spotted me).

Now, in the grand scheme of things, I realize that people complete 5K races on a regular basis, and that my speed may not have been all that fast, but let me explain why this is such a great success for me...

In September 2009, our church participated in a charitable 5K event.  My family, along with many others, registered for it.  This was almost two years before I started on my weight loss journey, and the farthest I was walking those days was from my house to the car, or in and out of my office, etc.  I really didn't take that into consideration when I signed up for the event back then, and just figured that since so many of my friends were taking part, I could too.

As we started out that day, I was pushing one of my children in his stroller and thought to myself, "this isn't so hard, I can do this..." but that feeling didn't last very long.  After just a short time, I found myself falling farther and farther behind in the pack of runners, joggers, and walkers.  Within a few minutes, I was the absolute last person trekking along.  Literally.  The LAST Person.  The police escort car assigned to bring up the rear was just a few feet behind me, and the space between me and the other folks in front of me was growing longer by the moment.  I was 37 years old and had been passed by everyone else participating in the race by an embarrassing distance, including children, senior citizens, and three women who were pushing people in wheelchairs!  I gave up altogether.  I dropped out of the course and cut across a parking lot and took my boys into the park where the finish line was so they could play while we waited for everyone else to complete the event.

That was three years ago, and the memory of that day has stayed with me.  I felt like such a failure that morning when I could not finish something I had started.  It was something that seemed so easy in my mind, yet my body simply couldn’t keep up back then.  When I started losing weight in June of 2011, one of my goals was to be able to complete a 5K and finish what I started.  15 months and 131 pounds later, I have done just that!  And...I have my eye on an official event I'm considering signing up for soon!

So, even though I was just at a local park, not participating in an official event this past weekend, it might as well have been the Olympics to me!  I experienced a great victory and I feel incredible about it!

Facing My Issues

October 2009                                                      August 2012

This past Sunday at church, I was wearing a t-shirt with our current sermon series title on it.  The front reads, "I've Got Issues" and the back says, "And So Do You."  It has been a fantastic series that has dealt with the issues of anger, family, and fear over the last three weeks.  We've got one more week to go, and I know it'll be great as well! 

As I was looking at the picture of me in this shirt, I couldn't help but think about my weight loss journey.  You see, everyone has issues in their lives.  Those areas of life that we try to tuck away because we don't want others to know that we're struggling with something.  No matter what the issue is, it will eventually surface, no matter how hard we try to cover it up, but when those issues result in carrying around extra physical weight on our bodies, it's impossible to hide at all.  You can dress yourself in the nicest clothes, wear the most expensive accessories, and sport a trendy haircut, but when you are overweight, none of those things can mask the fact that some facet of your life has gotten out of control.  The photo of me conducting a marriage vow renewal ceremony from October 2009 shows how hard I tried to look my best, yet there's no mistaking that something is definitely going on behind the scenes.

I understand that some people deal with medical-related issues that have caused weight gain and that is an entirely different situation altogether, but that is not the case for everyone who deals with their weight.  Some people eat to dull some hurt from past the past or a current fear, or they turn to food for comfort after a bad day.  I grew up in an environment where indulgent foods were plentiful and physical activity was non-existent and got stuck in a cycle of eating more and moving less.  I figured that since I had always been heavy, that would just be my lot in life.  I've known people who used to be an athlete or were regularly involved in some type of activity that required eating a lot to keep up with the physical demands but then that season ended, yet they still eat the same way.  Others simply love food and have a hard time regulating how much they allow themselves.  The list of food and weight related issues goes on and on...

The beautiful thing I've discovered in my life, is that when I stopped and faced my issues, and I mean I've really been taking a look at the hard truths in an honest and straight forward manner, well, that is what has given me the power to change.  As long as I kept trying to convince myself that the habits I had engaged in for so long were okay, it was impossible to live the life I so deeply wanted to be living.  By facing my issues, I am overcoming them by leaps and bounds!

Freedom can be found, but only if you face your issues!

Busted!

Just a quick update...For those of you who read my blog from 08/06/12 titled, "The 'P' Word", I just wanted to let you know that I have busted through that plateau phase and am now down over 5 more pounds since that post!  To date, I have now lost 120.4 pounds total!

I have discovered that a plateau is not a final stopping point, unless when you reach one, you give up!  It may be a frustrating place, but I choose to think of it as a yield sign, not a stop sign...It's a time of slowing down, looking around and assessing the situation, making the proper adjustments, then moving forward once again!

Happy Friday my friends!

Dreams to Reality

As a follow-up to my last post, I’d like to answer the question that I get asked most frequently about my weight loss…

“How did you make the decision to lose weight, and how have you stuck with it for so long?”

My answer is simple, really.  The short of it is…I came to the conclusion that the difference between dreams and reality is making a commitment to take action!

Now, here’s the rest of the story for those of you who appreciate a little more detail…Like many people who want to lose weight, I used to spend a lot of time wishing things were different for me.  I wanted to lose weight, and being the avid research and information buff that I am, I understood the ins and outs of proper nutrition and exercise and the benefits they would bring.  I read all about the mathematical computations for BMI and BMR and the function of the energy burning and storage systems in the body and how calories work in conjunction with those factors.  I had the desire to change and the knowledge to change, yet the problem was that I never did anything to cause change to happen.

I would be frustrated that I didn’t have the energy to play with my kids for very long.  I had hung onto the idea that since I was healthy (as in, I didn’t have any medical conditions and was not on any medications) that I was still doing fine, despite my weight.  I could still buy clothes that fit me, although it was getting harder to find my size and then nothing ever seemed to look quite right, but I justified it by thinking that if I could find my size then I was not alone.  I felt like if there were others out there just as big as me, I couldn’t be all that bad off, right?  I blamed it on the environment that I grew up in, ignoring the fact that I had left my parent’s home years and years ago and continued on in the same poor habits I developed there.  I shunned the word “excuse” and convinced myself that there were valid reasons I had gotten to the size I was at.  All along, I would want to lose weight with everything in me, yet it never happened. 

In the end, I finally reached the point where I decided that enough was enough.  If change was ever going to happen, it was only going to come if I got up and did something about it!

 I began my journey on my knees.  I spent time in prayer, first of all, asking God to forgive me for my failures and for all of the lies I had told myself, and for not taking care of my body, which He had lovingly created.  I then asked Him to give me the strength to make the changes that were needed to help me become strong and healthy, so that I could function at the very best level possible to accomplish all that He has for my life.  Lastly, I prayed that God would help me change my tastes, my cravings, and my desires when dealing with food.  I then immediately changed nearly everything about how I eat and view food, and eventually incorporated exercise into my schedule.  Now, it’s just how I life my life!

That is how my decision came about.  So how have I continued for almost 14 months?  It’s wrapped up in one word:  COMMITMENT.  I made a commitment the day I said those prayers.  A commitment to God, to myself and to my family, that I would do what it takes to see this thing through and reach my goals, and in the process I changed my entire lifestyle to reflect that commitment, from the way I think to the way I act.  This wasn’t some temporary diet program that once I reach a certain weight, it’s over and I go back to my old ways.  This is a commitment to lead a better life, one that’s characterized by balance, moderation, and healthy choices.  One where I realize that I’m far from perfect, but at the same time, I can love who I am and be confident in knowing that I am truly giving it my best and living life to the fullest!

So… I’ll say again that the difference between dreams and reality is making a commitment to take action!  I'd love to hear your stories!  What you doing today that will enable your own dreams to come true?  Leave a comment below if you'd like to share!

Questions & Answers

At this point in my weight loss journey, I get asked a lot of questions from people who have been watching my transformation.  I thought I'd take the opportunity to answer a few that I get pretty often.

Question: "What are you eating these days?"
My Answer:  Lots of whole foods, very little processed foods, no fast food, keeping between 1400-1500 calories per day.

Question: "Did you have weight loss surgery?"
My Answer:  No, I lost over 90 pounds in the first 11 months through changing my food habits, and have continued to lose as I upped my game by joining a gym to add cardio and strength training since May 2012.

Question: "How can you give up sweets/chocolate/bread/etc.?"
My Answer:  I haven't!  I can't imagine living the rest of my life without bread or mashed potatoes, but I don't eat them every day, and I've found healthier alternatives I've switched to that I love.  

Question: "Do you ever have a 'cheat day' and eat whatever you want?"
My Answer:  No, I don't have anything or anyone to cheat but myself if I were to eat something crazy.  I'm not on a diet program, so I have no specific restrictions.  My focus is on eating in a well-balanced manner each and every day.  For example, my sister makes the best cakes with fondant anywhere, and I enjoy some of that at family birthdays.  I'm not cheating by having a small piece.  I know it's coming, and I plan ahead for it to fit into my calories.  I don't eat a huge chunk of it.  A small piece is enough to enjoy! To put it into perspective, I eat broccoli 5 or 6 days a week, but I have eaten cake maybe 5 or 6 times in the past year.  I AM eating whatever I want to, because I truly want to eat the way that I am these days!

Question: "Don't you crave junk food once in a while?"
My Answer:  No, not really.  Once I was about 6 months in, I realized my tastes had completely changed.  My biggest craving now is watermelon!  If I haven't had any in a few days, I find myself making a lunchtime run to the grocery store and loading up on 2 or 3 pounds of seedless watermelon and I eat it over the next couple of days.  I buy it in the pre-cut bowls in the produce department, and that's my big splurge!

The question I get asked most often, without a doubt, is two-fold...
"How did you make the decision to lose weight, and how have you stuck with it so long?"

I'll answer it in my next blog post, so stay tuned!

The "P" Word

One of the things I always want to convey through this blog is the real-life aspect of weight loss.  While I do not advocate using a public forum to vent frustrations or complaints, there are definitely real challenges to face when you set out to lose weight, especially when the amount you intend to lose is significant, and I believe it’s important to share those things as well. 

For the last two weeks, my scale has not budged downward.  In fact, I’ve had daily fluctuations, but stayed within the same 3-pound range for the last 17 days.  I have not strayed from my food plan, and continue to eat between 1400-1500 calories per day.  In addition, I’ve been doing great at the gym and have not missed a single workout.  So what’s going on?  Let me tell you…

(Before I go any further, I know that many people believe you should only weigh-in weekly, or even monthly, to avoid the emotional highs and lows that can be a part of daily weigh-ins.  For me, however, daily has worked for the last 13 months, so I’m sticking with it.)

Because of the detailed progress spreadsheet I keep, where I track my daily weigh-ins, I can look back and see that this is not the first time I’ve reached, what most would term, a plateau.  The term “plateau” (according to dictionary.com) has several meanings, all having to do with reaching a place where progress ceases to rise.  There are two definitions, however, that really stand out to me.  The first one reads, “remain at a stable level of achievement,” and the second one calls a plateau, “a period of little or no apparent progress…” (italics mine).

When you know you’re doing the work, yet you’re not seeing the expected results, it’s important to remember that word “achievement.”  Just because I didn’t lose 2 pounds this week doesn’t take anything away from the 115 pound loss I have already achieved!  When you reach a plateau, that’s a good time to look back at how far you’ve really come!  The second important thing to think about is the second definition I mentioned.  Just because your progress doesn’t look apparent on the scale doesn’t mean you’ve come to a screeching halt!  For me, it’s a signal that my body is ready for me to change things up a bit.  It’s time to increase the incline on the treadmill and add in more interval training, it’s time to change around the order in which I perform my strength training exercises.  It’s time to flip around what time of day I eat my larger calorie meals vs. my smaller calorie meals, etc.  From experience, a few small changes will go a long way in getting things kick-started back up again.

Another interesting thing I realized about my plateau periods.  Each one has come when I’ve reached a weight that I maintained for a long period in the past.  For example, the last plateau I experienced came when I got back down to the size I was 10 years ago.  I had been at that weight for the better part of 5 years or more.  Right now, I’m made it down to the size I was in my last two years of high school, which I continued to be throughout college and for a few years after that.  Each of these plateaus came when I reached a point that my body was comfortable in for a long time in the past.  While my body may want to stay here to visit for a while, I’m packin’ it up and movin’ it on down the street to a much smaller address!  The eviction notice has been served!

With each of the plateaus I’ve went through previously, as I come out of them, I’ve hit great new loss levels quickly.  That being said, I am poised and ready to break through to new lows very soon!

My take-aways from plateau periods include:

1)     Plateaus will happen, they are inevitable!

2)     Don’t give up just because you’ve hit a plateau!

3)     Plateaus are a chance to realize how much you’ve already acheived!

4)     Plateaus should not become comfort zones!

5)     Scale progress may not be apparent in a plateau, but there are other kinds of progess!

6)     Plateaus are a chance to change things around and make it more interesting!

7)     Don’t slack off when you reach a plateau, keep working and you’ll break through it!

“Let us not become weary in doing good,

for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

~ Galatians 6:9 ~

Comparison Photos

Me December 2010, about 6 months before starting to lose weight,
close to my highest weight ever.

Me June 2012, just over 12 months in and down 106 pounds.

Me July 2012, 13 months in and down 114.6 pounds.
(Ignore the fact that I was having a bad hair day and had it all pulled back into a pony tail you can't see in the picture!)







I Like It! I Really Like It!

As someone who has been overweight practically my entire life, physical activity is not something I have ever really enjoyed.  With a family that had no interest in sports, the outdoors, or anything that required any kind of physical activity, I was never encouraged to participate in anything that would promote physical fitness and my family never did anything like this together. As a child and teen, the required gym classes in school were complete torture for me.  Things like running relay races, rope climbing, or even playing games like basketball were never fun, but instead, typically left me in tears because I never had the strength, speed, stamina, or energy my classmates always seemed to have. 

The one exception came during high school, when my love of playing music and acting edged out my hatred of being active only slightly, but it was enough that I was in the marching band throughout high school and for one year of college, and performed in many stage shows that involved choreography and basic dance.  I credit my involvement in these activities as helping me keep from gaining even more weight than I did when I was younger. 

When I first started my weight loss journey 13 months ago, I did a little bit of exercise in the beginning, but my heart really wasn’t in it.  I dove into the deep end immediately where my food changes were concerned, but I still made a lot of excuses for not working out regularly.  I still felt like the chubby little kid that just wasn’t cut out for exercise, so I pretty much gave it up until I was 11 months in and had lost almost 100 pounds.  It was at that point I resigned myself to the fact that I really needed to start working on toning while I continued to lose and move forward towards my goal weight.

Over the last 2 months since I joined the gym, things have changed drastically for me.  I have found that I actually love working out!  I won’t sugar-coat it…it’s been hard work, but as the saying goes, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you!”  I checked in with a trainer before I got started initially, and he gave me specific instructions for both cardio and strength work to do 3 times each week at the gym, and he told me to make sure to get in an hour of some other exercise (swimming, group classes, at home DVD’s, etc.) at least 2 other days each week.  At the end of each month, the trainer works with me again to assess my progress and add new things to my workout program, which has involved adding new exercises as well as increasing sets and reps, and increasing how much weight I’m lifting. 

For the first time in my life, I can truly say that I look forward to exercising.  I don’t give up half-way through, and I don’t skip out or cheat on my schedule.  I have made it a priority.  Some days I go to the gym at 5:30am, other days I go at 5:00pm.  Some days I’m in the middle of my living room with the furniture pushed back and the dog trying to stay out of my way.  Wherever or whenever, I am determined to take care of my body and work towards making it the best it can possibly be.  I have dumped the excuses, and instead have chosen to view each workout like this:

Exercise…

I don’t stop when I’m tired.

I don’t stop when I don’t feel like doing it.

I don’t stop when it hurts.

I stop when I’m done.

Taking Inventory

Our children are getting ready to start back to their new school year in just a few weeks, and in preparation, my husband and I have been talking about what new school clothes we need to buy for each of them.  Since our school district wears uniforms, our kids have to have two wardrobes, one with their shorts, slacks, and polo shirts for school, and one with their jeans and t-shirts and play clothes.  Since they haven't been wearing their school attire for the last couple of months (and have grown considerably over the summer as kids tend to do), we've been taking inventory this week to figure out what pieces each of the boys need for the new school year, and what garments they can still fit into from last year (which isn’t very much!)

So what does this have to do with weight loss?  I'm glad you asked!

It all comes down to this...

You have to figure out where you are before you can determine where you're going.

I can’t appropriately buy my kids the new school clothes they need unless I know what they’ve got in the closet.  I can think they are good on slacks and not buy any, then when the weather turns cold, find out all they have is one pair of pants that have the knees worn out of them.  In the same way, a person can think they're doing all right with how they're eating because they're “balancing” things with a diet soda and a salad occasionally, or bypassing a second trip to the buffet, or eating grilled chicken with rice from time to time, when in reality, their body is not getting the nutrition it needs to thrive, they're gaining weight from all the junk food, and all they’ve really putting into their body is coming up short!

When I first started on my path towards a healthy life through weight loss and exercise, I began my food journal.  I did not make any changes to what I was eating, but simply logged the calories (and other nutritional data) into the food journal app I have on my phone.  The reality of the number of calories I was regularly eating astounded me!  I promised myself I would never treat my body that poorly ever again.

Before I started losing weight, I was not someone who ate multiples of food (sometimes you'll hear of overweight folks who eat like 8 eggs, 12 pieces of toast and a pound of bacon for breakfast, or an entire pizza, 2-liter of soda, and whole bag of chips for dinner).  That wasn't me.  I ate “normal” meals, in that I was eating breakfast, lunch and dinner, with little to no snacking, and not eating tons of food at each meal.  My problem focused more on what food items I did eat.  I was eating fast food meal combos for breakfast and lunch most work days, and often having full-sized restaurant meals a few times a week for dinner.  When we cooked dinner at home, we used to eat lots of pasta and other heavy entrees and never measured out proper portions.  As a result, back then, it was nothing for me to eat more calories in one meal then I do in an entire day now without even considering the nutritional value (or lack thereof) of what I was eating.

Taking inventory is an important first step to losing weight.  Let me encourage you to start a food journal of your own.  There are lots of great websites and phone apps available that make it very simple and easy to keep track.  The one I use takes me less than 5 minutes a day to track everything I eat and drink.  When you come face to face with the true number of calories you’re consuming each day, along with the amount of sodium, cholesterol, fat, sugar, and carbohydrates you’re actually taking in, you may be as shocked as I was.  It may not be pretty to see the numbers, but it’s worth it if it causes you to start making healthier choices like it was for me!

Make a Choice, Make a Change

I recently ran across this saying, "Life doesn't come with a remote.  You've got to get up and change it yourself!"  Boy, did that resonate with me!

You see, it doesn't matter what aspect of life you're talking about...it could be weight loss, your finances, your job, your friendships, your marriage, your walk with God, or anything else you're dealing with...you CAN choose to find an avenue of change.  All too often, however, it's easy to think that there's only one way to change a situation, and you just can't seem to put your hands on it. 

It really is like the television remote.  You may be at home, with the TV all to yourself, happily watching your favorite show, and as it ends, something you really don't like at all comes on.  You want to change the channel, but you can't find the remote.  Your kids aren't around, so you can't call them in to come and change it for you.  You dig into the couch cushions, push the dog out of the way, and look under the blanket you're cuddled up under.  No remote.  You look again at the show that's starting and think, "hmmm...maybe this show isn't so bad after all," because you don't want to get up.  Before you know it, you've zoned out in front of a show you don't really like, but since it was there, you accepted it.  It's easier to just watch what's coming on then it is to make the effort to get up, walk across the room, and change the channel at the TV set itself. 

Isn't that like what happens in our life sometimes?  One day, you're going along, feeling like you're on the right track.  You're happy and enjoying the path you're on, but then, something comes your way that isn't the best thing for you.  Because of the effort it would take to change things for the better, you sigh and get comfortable with the mediocrity, negativity, or undesirable situation that has presented itself.  After a while, it feels like things have been this way for so long, that it would be impossible to make a change, so you just live with it, feebly appreciating today because you figure tomorrow will probably be worse.

That's how I used to feel about my weight.  I had resigned myself to the belief that being overweight was just my lot in life and that it was something I would always have to live with.  My clothes that I bought one month probably wouldn't fit the next month because I would most likely gain a couple more pounds before I wore them again.  It would stand to reason this would happen, since I have a family history of weight issues.  My parents were/are overweight and unhealthy.  Their parents were overweight and unhealthy.  So it stands to reason that I would be overweight and unhealthy as well...or does it?

The turning point in my life came when I realized that I was NOT powerless over my weight.  But, in order to do something about it, I had to make a choice to make a change.  I had to stop sitting idly by wishing and hoping things were different.  You can stand in front of the mirror all day long, hating what you see and desperately wanting to look and feel better, but nothing's going to happen until you decide to do something about it.  I chose to make a change, and after losing 108 pounds so far, I'm confident I will reach my ultimate weight loss goals.  Goals that a year ago were only a dream.  Goals that today are becoming my reality.  All because I made a choice and made a change.

Get up and change the channel...

Motivation

Motivation.  This is one of those buzz-words that gets thrown around a lot in different settings.  For instance, an employer wants to motivate his employees to increase sales.  A coach wants to motivate his team to win games.  A teacher wants to motivate her students to learn the course material, and so on.  But what is motivation, really?

According to one definition, motivation is, "providing with a reason to act a certain way" (thank you, dictionary.com!).  When I was young my mom used to try to motivate me to clean my room.  The reason behind it was that if I didn’t, I would be a in a lot of trouble, so her reasoning was plenty good enough for me at the time!  As a child, I didn’t want to clean my room all too often, but due to the parental pressure my mom was able to put on me, and the power she held over the consequences if I didn’t respond, I would eventually give in and get the job done, albeit reluctantly.  Hearing my mom recite the benefits of a clean room, however, was not enough to cause me to commit to keeping up with it, and every few days mom would have to, ahem…shall we say,  “encourage” me to clean my room once again.  It wasn’t until I moved out into my own home that living in a clean and orderly environment really became important to me.  Then, I no longer kept things neat because someone was looking over my shoulder and forcing me to, or trying to get me to buy into their way of thinking about it, but instead, I embraced the idea for myself and it became a part of me.  I keep my home nice because that’s how I want it to look.

This same principle holds true where weight loss and healthy choices are concerned.  It seems like everywhere you look, someone is trying to motivate you by shouting, “You need to loose weight!”  It might be the pressure of society that holds to a stereotypical view of what constitutes beauty.  This may come through portrayals in media or through the attitudes and opinions of people around you, sometimes even from close relationships.  Life and health insurance companies may be applying the pressure for you to meet their underwriting guidelines.  Your doctor may be telling you that you’re facing serious health issues if you don’t get your weight down.  Somewhere along the way, someone is trying to get you to do things differently for reasons they deem important, whether you buy into their reasons or not.

No matter where the voice originates, having someone else tell you that you need to make a change is rarely received well, especially when it deals with something as personal as your weight.  At best, some people temporarily cave to the pressures others put on them in this area.  They might lose a little weight initially, but because their reasons for doing it are not truly their own, it doesn’t take long before they falter and often regain what they lost, and then some.  This results in greater frustration and feeling worse than they did before.

So, how do you lose weight successfully and keep it off?  One of the answers to that question is that the motivation, the real reasons behind it, must truly be your own.  You need to know that you’re passing up fast food because your body functions so much better when you eat wholesome foods, not because someone else makes fun of you for eating french fries.  You have to want to give yourself the best chances at living a long life by reducing your weight, rather than having someone try to make you feel guilty that you may not live to see your grandchildren if you don’t drop some pounds.  You have to want increased strength, endurance, and the ability to function better in daily activities for yourself, rather than feeling like you have to look a certain way to impress people.  You have to believe that your body was a gift from God and should be treated with respect and well cared for, instead of accepting the super-sized portions and nutritionally void options that are so cheap, widely advertised, and readily available.

Having the proper motivation puts the “why” behind the “what” and enables you to make the right choices and leads to a healthy lifestyle!

A Marathon...In Bits and Pieces

I am, by nature, an extremely organized individual in many areas of my life, and weight loss is no exception.  Keeping up with data and creating charts and graphs has helped me identify trends in my progress and lets me readily see what efforts produce the best results.  In addition, having information such as my body measurements, BMI, BMR, body fat %, and other metrics on hand helps me see that this journey is about more than just the numbers on the scale.  Seeing the number go down on the scale is not my only goal.  Improving my overall health and fitness is also very important to me as well.  When those things are in balance, the numbers on the scale will follow.

On one of my progress spreadsheets I keep track of each of my workouts, including the name of each strength-training exercise, the number of sets and reps I do, and the weight I’m lifting (or pushing, pulling, etc.).  I also log my cardio work by what I’m doing, the amount of time I spend doing it, the distance I’ve gone (for swimming, walking, etc.), and my total calorie burn.  It’s quick and easy for me to use and with a glance I can see where I’m at each week and I can challenge myself to go a little further each time.

Today, as I was entering the stats from this morning’s workout, I realized something I found exciting!  Since joining the gym, I’ve included treadmill work in 18 of my workouts.  In the course of those 18 workouts, which totaled 9.9 hours of time, I have walked/jogged a total of 26.3 miles, which is just over the distance of a marathon!  Now, I understand full well that I have not, by any means, had the experience of actually participating in an actual marathon, but knowing that I have covered that distance over a few workouts feels pretty amazing to me!  Let me explain the significance of this…

When I look back to the time before I started implementing healthy food choices into my life regularly last June, mobility had started being a serious problem for me.  Due to issues with my sciatic nerve causing terrible back and leg pain (as the result of falling some time ago and it being unable to fully heal because of my weight), things as simple as moving from a laying down position in the bed to sitting up, or rising from the living room couch were excruciating, and often could take 30 minutes or more.  It was often accompanied by a lot of pain-filled tears and much prayer for strength and healing.  Once I was finally up and about, walking any distance over just a few steps was typically out of the question.  Even trying to make a short trip into a store would find me hunched over the buggy trying to relieve the pressure on my back within just a couple minutes of walking in.  Doing anything that required me to be on my feet for more than 5 minutes was next to impossible. 

As hard as it is to admit, being as overweight as I was before I started this journey, my life was hindered in everything from sleep, to playing with my children, to travel, to just about everything else that required physical activity.  When it’s painful to sit, stand, or lie down, there is little respite. As my weight has come down, however, the back pain has subsided greatly and my mobility has improved to where I don't have to worry about it anymore!  I now look forward to getting out and about and I’m not afraid of being somewhere that requires a lot of standing or walking.  The only time I think about getting around in a situation these days, is when I stop to realize how great it is to move freely again, and then I say a prayer of thanks to God for it!  I still deal with pain from time to time, but it’s not constant anymore, and it's nowhere near as bad as what it was before, and I believe it’s only going to keep getting better as I continue exercising and losing weight! 

So, when I look at my workout log and see that I’ve walked 26+ miles, it makes me see just how far I’ve really come and it gives me the motivation to keep going, because I know I’m definitely headed in the right direction!  Maybe...just maybe, one of these days, I just might go all 26 miles in the same day!

Looking Through Old Photos

With my 40^th birthday quickly approaching on Saturday (EEK! I’ve only got two more days to still say I’m “in my 30’s”!), I have been looking through hundreds upon hundreds (no exaggerating) of pictures this week.  I’ve been pulling out ones from significant moments in my life that my family is using to put together a slideshow for the party they’ve giving me this weekend.  As I’ve been reminiscing, so many of the photos have made me smile, laugh, and even brought tears to my eyes as I’ve been reminded of the people and events that have meant so much to me over the years.  I have been blessed greatly to be so surrounded throughout my life by people that I love, and who I know, without a doubt, love me!

I’ve mentioned in previous posts that I’ve been heavy pretty much my entire life, and looking through the pictures put that right back in front of me.  The last picture of me at a normal size for my age was when I was 15 months old.  The next photo I found was of me at 28 months old, and I looked like a totally different child.  Rather than starting to lose the baby face and thinning out like most toddlers do, I was rounder and a significantly overweight toddler.  Each photo afterwards showed that trend continuing as I grew up, and it goes on right through the photos taken in the spring of last year before I started this journey towards a healthy weight.

Today, however, things have changed and I stand on the edge of crossing into totally new territory.  I am currently wearing (and quickly shrinking out of) the size I wore as a senior in high school.  What that means, is that once I cross into the next size down, I will officially be smaller than I was when I graduated high school (waaaayyy back in 1990), and will be the smallest I’ve been in my entire adult life!  I am excited to experience life in my 40’s being the healthiest and most fit I’ve ever been! 

Why Am I Sharing My Story?

So...I have this blog, and I make posts on Facebook, and I talk freely to people who ask me questions or make comments about my weight loss...but why? Why am I so open about something that is so deeply personal? I mean, after all, I'm talking about what I eat, the clothes I wear, the exercise I'm doing, my health, and other facets of my life that only my closest friends and family members would normally know about. So why am I now discussing it publicly?
 
There are several reasons. First, I am not alone in making changes to a healthy way of living, but the only way to discover that is to be willing to talk about it. Since embarking on my weight loss journey, I have drawn strength and encouragement from talking to others who have been bold enough to share with me. Because weight is something that people are often embarrassed or ashamed about, or an area of their life they feel like they have lost control over, so many are fearful of talking about it. This fear isolates men and women every day by making them feel like weight is a taboo subject. Talking about it, however, connects you to those who understand what you're going through. Just knowing you're not alone is comforting.
 
Another reason I'm being very open about this is because I have a heart to help others who share the same struggles.  I have been very overweight my entire life. Ever since I was a toddler I've been heavy. I know what it's like to be the slowest one trying to run in gym class in school. I know what it's like to be ridiculed by both strangers and acquaintances because of my appearance. I know what it's like to have a horrible time trying to find clothes that fit, and to never feel like I look good.  I know what it’s like to be the biggest one in the room.  I know what it’s like to hide behind kids, pillows, animals, furniture, or friends to cover up as much as possible in photos.  I know what it’s like…to just want to be different than I am…By sharing my story I hope to encourage, to support, and to inspire others to know that they CAN make the life changes they so desperately desire.  It is possible!

A third reason for being so candid about my weight loss is that it holds me accountable.  When you’re extremely overweight, you have to lose a pretty significant number of pounds before your losses start becoming apparent to others.  Overweight folks often hide behind oversized and baggy clothes anyway, so even when the pounds start coming off, it may not be noticed for a while.  Because the fear of failure often lurks close on your heels when you try to change over to a healthy lifestyle, if you don’t tell anyone, then no one will know if you go don’t stick to your commitment.  I have to admit, it was very hard, initially, to tell people about the changes I was making.  But by doing so, I’ve developed a network of friends who check in on me regularly.  They ask me how it’s going at the gym and how many pounds I’ve lost each week.  This helps me stay accountable to working towards my goals.

Finally, and most importantly, by speaking out about where I’ve come from and where I’m headed, I get the opportunity to publicly acknowledge the fact that it has only been because of God that I’ve been able to achieve any measure of success.  The Bible says that we have power to overcome the things that seek to destroy us.  This includes issues with food and weight because they can definitely destroy you!  That power comes through the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross, thereby allowing you to have a relationship with him, and by the word of your testimony of what He has done for you (Revelation 12:11).  So, my testimony is that by surrendering this area of my life to Him, I’ve found healing for my past, strength for today, and hope for tomorrow…and you can too!

My One Year Weight Loss Anniversary...104.9 Pounds Lost!

WOW!  I can hardly believe it has been an entire YEAR since I began my weight loss journey!  Last year on June 16^th I stepped onto the scale and cried.  No, perhaps “sobbed” is a better word for it.  I couldn’t get my mind around the number that showed up on the scale.  I wondered how in the world had I let myself go like that?  I’ve always been overweight, but for crying out loud, not to that extreme! 

I had to make a change.  If I didn’t make a drastic turn around now, every medical statistic pointed towards a future defined by serious health problems and a shortened lifespan.  I made a decision that day.  I refused to give up a long and healthy life in exchange for a meal in a paper bag shoved at me through a drive-through window and served with a side of fries!

So, here I am, exactly one year later.  Only now, my tears are tears of joy!  I set a goal to lose 100 pounds in a year, and I’ve not only met it, but I have exceeded my goal!  I have lost 104.9 pounds in exactly one year!!!  Right now, I’m getting ready to head out to the gym this morning to have my 2^nd monthly check-in with my personal trainer, who is about to ramp up my workouts for my next phase of exercise as I start working on my year two goals, and guess what?  BRING IT ON!!!

So…what kind of difference can one year make?  Here’s what I’ve experienced over this past year:

- I have lost a grand total of 104.9 pounds!

- I have lost a total of 2.75 inches around my neck!

- I have lost a total of 4.0 inches around my chest!

- I have lost a total of 8.0 inches around my waist!

- I have lost a total of 13.0 inches around my hips!

- My BMI has gone down by 16.9 points!

- My reflux symptoms have all but disappeared and I no longer take any medication at all!

- I have gone down 5 sizes in clothing!

- I have gone from limited mobility (due to a combination of my weight and a back injury), to being able to walk/jog a 5K in under an hour!

- I have gone from being completely sedentary, to working out at the gym 4-5 times per week!

- I have gone from eating around 3,000 calories per day, to eating 1,500-1,600 calories per day

- I have gone from eating fast food 10-12 times per week to eliminating it from my diet!

- I have gone from struggling to carry bags of groceries from the car to the house, to lifting weights!

- I have gone from drinking approximately 64 ounces of diet soda per day, to drinking approximately 80 ounces (or more) of water per day!

As I look back over this year, I have been very blessed with incredible support along the way, and I would like to make a few special notes today, on my one-year anniversary…

I must give God the praise and all of the glory for giving me the strength to walk this path!  There are places He has mended in my heart and in my mind along the way, and I have let go of emotional weight right alongside the physical weight.  It’s only because of Him that I’ve experienced any measure of success!

I am also forever grateful to my sweet husband!  He has been my biggest cheerleader!  He has loved me and told me I was beautiful, no matter what size I have been.  He has prayed for me and helped me celebrate every pound I’ve lost.  There just aren’t enough words to describe my thankfulness for him.  He indeed has my heart!

Thank you to my encouraging church!  So many people have said positive things to me and been so encouraging to me!  I appreciate you very much!

Lastly, I have a small handful of people who have been praying for me and encouraging me privately since I began.  They have held my trust and as I confided in them about where I was starting from and where I was trying to get, and have continued to support me throughout.  They are a treasure to my life!

All of that being said…my work is far from over!  I have a good deal more weight to lose before I can consider myself done and move into maintenance mode.  I am ready to start moving towards my year-two goals!

Changed Thinking About Food

Is everything in my life now sunshine and roses because of my weight loss efforts so far?  Nope, I can’t say that it is, but by making healthy changes, I’m better equipped to function and handle each and every day.  I have the strength, stamina, and endurance for whatever comes my way, and the exercise helps me reduce stress and sleep better.  I have to say that making strides towards a healthy weight has brought nothing but benefits to my life!

There have been challenges I’ve faced in this process through this year though.  The biggest, I believe, has been in changing the way I think about food and getting a grip on how my thoughts and actions are so inter-connected.  Getting my mindset aligned with good nutrition and proper serving sizes has definitely has been the hardest part.  Once I got it, though, I really got it! Because I do eat in restaurants a couple of times each week, let me use that to give you an example…

In the past (old habit days), when I would eat at a restaurant, I would immediately scan the menu, looking to see what I could order that gave me the best value for my money, while filling my taste for rich, savory, “comfort” foods.  I wanted to make sure I got the most for my food dollars.  That typically resulted in some kind of deep-fried meat, with gravy, and two or three side items (can you say “macaroni & cheese” and “french fries”!) and some kind of bread basket, which I admittedly allowed to waiter to refill. 

Now, however, I go straight to the light or low-calorie section of the menu, looking for grilled meats and steamed vegetables (which I order to be prepared without butter or oils).  I occasionally have a piece of bread, but limit myself to one, and have the waiter take away the basket and skip the refills.  Instead of trying to get the most food for my money, now I’m trying to get the lowest calories and healthiest choice for my money!

Interestingly enough, it did not take a long time for me to implement this changed way of thinking.  Once I decided enough was enough (literally!) there was no looking back.  Initially, it was difficult.  I had to make the healthy choices whether I felt like it or not.  I had to force myself smile while I ordered the steamed vegetable medley instead of the loaded potato.  It was hard to pass up the dessert menu when the rest of the table was ordering cheesecake.  However, when the meal was over, I left the table physically full and satisfied from good foods, but more importantly, I felt empowered because for the first time in my life, I had control over food, rather than letting it have control over me! 

After just a few weeks, I no longer felt the tug-of-war between what I wanted to order and what I knew I needed to order.  Not only had my thinking and my actions changed, but I found that my tastes had completely changed as well!  I can honestly say that I really don’t crave the foods I used to eat anymore and it doesn't bother me in the least when others around me are eating high-calorie indulgences.

So, if you’re trying to make your own healthy choices, I would tell you that making a drastic change IS possible, but only if you change how you think about your food.  If you think about healthy food as the enemy, like it’s keeping you from what you really want to eat, or there’s no way you could possibly enjoy it, then you’ll have a long, hard road ahead of you.  If, however, you choose to remind yourself that you’re worth treating your body well, commit to making healthy choices, and start seeing good foods as your friend instead of your enemy, you’ll set yourself up for success!

Surviving Vacation

It has been a very busy couple of weeks!  Our family recently returned from a ten-day road trip to visit with family and friends that spanned over 2,200 miles.  We stayed in three different hotels in various parts of Kansas and Arkansas, as well as a few nights with my husband’s parents.  Did I mention we made the trip with our two boys, who are both under 8 years old?  Oh, and our dog, I can’t leave out the dog!  (Note to self: don’t ever feed the dog sausage from the hotel breakfast buffet right before getting on the road…it’s not pretty!)  We had a fantastic time, and when we got home we all still liked each other, so I consider the trip a success!

Being on the road and eating at restaurants and other people’s homes for so many days is difficult, at best, when you’re trying to maintain a 1,600 calorie per day eating schedule and wanting to get in a few workouts!  Through some creative planning ahead, and the understanding of my mother-in-law (who didn’t mind that I brought in groceries and prepared some of my own meals while we were with them), I managed to keep within my calorie budget throughout our vacation and to eat very much like I do when we are at home.  I feel very accomplished!

Eating right on this trip was probably the biggest challenge I have faced with maintaining my daily food goals since I began nearly a year ago.  Truth is, I was very nervous about it before we left on the trip.  By planning ahead and letting family members know beforehand that I would be eating differently, however, it helped to alleviate the stress.  Also, we eat at restaurants enough normally that I already knew what choices to make when we ate out while travelling and cooking wasn’t an option.

Through our travels, I was also able to get in four good swims in the hotel pools where I swam enough laps each time to get in a good workout.  So, even with travel, I purposely made time for exercise, something I would have never dreamed of doing a year ago! On the final day of the trip, after we got home and everything in and settled, I ran up to the gym for a while and knocked out a good strength training workout along with an hour of cardio. 

In the end, like everything else in life, it all comes down to choices.  You can choose to throw off all restraint because you’re “on vacation” and indulge in too many high-calorie foods, using the excuse that you, “want to enjoy yourself.”  Most likely, you’ll later regret that decision as you feel awful from eating such things, and/or, when you get home and step on the scale you’ll have a lot of extra work to do to play catch up for the pounds your indulgences cost you. Nothing sucks the enjoyment out of something like an upset stomach, or worse, a 5 pound weight gain!  But, you have another option...You can choose to eat with moderation.  You can take a few minutes to plan and build balanced treats into your day (yes, I had a couple bites of my mother-in-law’s Kansas Dirt Cake and a small slice of her homemade banana bread, but without regret and without going over my calories!)  By making the right choices, you can be proud of yourself for staying true to your commitment to a healthy lifestyle. 

When you choose wisely, you can look yourself in the mirror and know that this is who you have become…a person of balance, who is in control of your eating and able to make good choices that will contribute to your own health and well-being, and trust me, that feels AMAZING!